Changsha Gaga

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Proof that pandas are massive lads.

I am not trying to make this a Panda related website. However, I am noticing a trend in the things that I post. (if you haven’t seen “say never say no to panda” see below) However, this video is too good to miss really. Most people think of pandas as cute furry docile creatures. This video proves that that is all a load of baloney. Pandas are massive LADS. Fact. Enjoy.

 

Ps some non panda posts will come shortly.

 

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Cool. for an ad.

 

Pretty good for a beer ad.

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Bawtry dog-meat scandal – wait, am I being stereotyped?

Zhang Lijia’s Guardian piece ‘Dog meat at a Chinese restaurant inYorkshire’ – why do such myths spread? was prompted by the story of a Chinese restaurant that has been put in financial difficulty by a local rumour of a diner choking on retired racing greyhound’s microchip.

While I have sympathy for a business that suffers due to vindictive rumour mongering, the article presents a number of strands of criticism that don’t really tie up.  Zhang takes the opportunity to comment generally on the fascination of westerners with the oddities of Chinese cuisine, calling our obsession a form of racism.    To my mind, she throws out the “R” word too freely.

I understand her frustration, for example, that UK prime time television documentaries on China are more likely to end up with a donkey penis feast than a serious social discourse.  However it is hard to deny that examining the eating habits in other countries can be educational and entertaining.  And for those who are interested, programs on China’s social, economic and political issues are also common (recently, BBC Four’s excellent Storyville series Law of the Dragon).

Always an alternative

But I was most surprised by Zhang’s claim that although “China has a fabulous and sophisticated cuisine, westerners always focus on the tiny percentage of what we eat that is weird”.  This seems factually unsound.

Chinese food is one of the globe’s “3 Grand Cuisines”, a feature of every UK high street and a major draw for visitors to China (and perhaps part of the reason some stay).  However it is reproduced, Chinese food is hugely popular worldwide, and not for being weird.

But secondly, since she brings it up, there is no way that it is only a “tiny percentage” of what is eaten in China that people in the UK might consider weird.  You can eat dog.  Generally, many more parts of many more animals feature on menus.  When living in Dalian I saw the phrase 天上龙肉 地上驴肉 (In heaven dragon meat, on earth donkey meat) adorning restaurant exteriors.  But nobody’s going to force you to eat anything you don’t want (note: that is not true).

Some elements of Chinese, or any other, cuisine may not be to everyone’s taste.  But Zhang doesn’t seem to acknowledge that the majority take an interest in aspects of cultural diversity for making the world a more interesting place.

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Ēggel hazâhâḇ flak at “Best Village in China”

Not since Aaron’s notorious idol misjudgement on Mount Sinai has a life-size aureate bovine caused quite such a stir.  Jiangsu Party guy Wu Renbao’s decision to install a £31m solid gold statue of an ox on the 60th floor of rural Huaxi’s new 1,076ft supertower has been branded a gross extravagance by some, particularly as many of the farmers who live in its shadow earn low wages.

you COW!

Villagers have reportedly started a helicopter business to give visitors a better view of the tower – which could be seen as indicative of the sort of Wu-instilled entrepreneurial zeal that has made Huaxi one of the richest villages in China and led to him to be decorated as a “Top National Contributor to Poverty-Alleviation”.  However I am not convinced of the long term economic rewards of skyscraper one-upmanship.

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Never Say No To Panda

Best advert I have seen in a while.

 

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Filed under Advertising, cheese, comedy, Panda, TV

Kim Jong Il looks at a Donor Kebab

I think I have found my new favourite website.

Things that Kim Jong Il looks at. This site is truly awesome. Good job.

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Filed under comedy, News, Politics, Propaganda

World’s most popular beer? Want to pee on a turtle?

Any idea what the most popular beer in the world is?

Sitting back with your friends enjoying a bud? Waaazzzzup?

enjoy drinking what is probably the best lager?

Would you give a XXXX for it? Best things come to those who wait?

No. The world’s most popular beer is Snow Beer (雪花啤酒)

According to the Telegraph, the Chinese drank 16.5bn pints of Snow last year.

Although most Chinese beers taste quite samey (think of a watered down bud light), I happen to think Snow actually tastes quite nice with a spicy meal. It is pretty inoffensive. At least I thought they were until I saw their latest marketing campaign…..

Snow beer are offering several lucky punters the chance to go to Kekexili – the Tibetan plateau. Here the fortunate winners can trod around on environmentally protected ground pissing off endangered species such as the Tibetan antelope . According to Jonathan Watts’ article in the Guardian, the plateau is “China’s most treasured nature reserve’ and has a ‘No Human Zone’, which as the name implies, is not supposed to be visited by anyone, yet Snow have gone ahead with their promotion even before they have permission.”

It would be as if Fosters offered their punters the chance for a lads holiday to the Galapagos islands to go and drink some brews, piss on a turtle’s face and eat its eggs in a giant fry up.

I should stop now, I don’t want to give them any ideas for competitions.

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Filed under Advertising, Animal, Beer, comedy, environment, Film, News, Tibet

That Ai Wei Wei controversial review of Beijing in full.

So you want to know what its like being in a Chinese state prison? It is a bit like the Kafka-esque nightmare of trying to get a westbound cab on a street that only goes east. I tried to make Beijing my home. Built a nest.

But a bird like me needs a solid tree for my nest. Beijing is a withering polluted willow tree. Having said that, there are some great places to go for cocktails.

If you want a cheap and cheerful night in Beijing. Mix and Vics are a safe bet. Blu bar is pretty cool.

Lychee Martinis are excellent in Beijing. It is really hard to get a cab sometimes. In summer Beijing gets super stuffy. Aircon is a must.

Apartments are getting more and more expensive. You can pay a fortune in Chaoyang for a room that is barely the size of a cell. (I should know). The apple store can get really busy sometimes. er. Am I allowed to say that?

Love Ai WeiWei


Crowds at the Apple Store Beijing

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David Ovulation Test

Late?

Had unprotected sex?

Have no fear and let the David Ovulation Test allay your fears.

 

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Filed under comedy, Health